Thomas Helmchen, Radiocarbon Dating, Materials Science
A few years ago, a sexy new trend cropped up on the coasts. Teens started dating older men: whether the men were in their early 40s or even 50s, it didn’t matter. In fact, that older men are usually able to snag a desirable teen is considered a compliment by the kids. In a few years, this “ageplay” (as it’s now called) trend will reach all corners of the country. What do you think? Is it a creepy idea? A harmless one? Or maybe not even an idea at all?
The most common question we get about dating an older man is about ageplay. The question could be described as normal. What is it? The short answer is that it involves an older man dating a much younger woman, usually a woman in high school. Is this disturbing? Is it ok? Are there any issues? Are there any downsides? I don’t know. I don’t see any downside to it. It’s not a big deal. I think it’s the absolute perfect way to have a healthy, loving, flirty dating experience, in fact. I don’t think it’s anything to be afraid of, and I don’t think it’s anything to be ashamed of. But what do I know? I’m just dating a man in his 30s. I’d really love to know your opinion on this. Let’s ask our readers.
Now, a few things:
1. This is not a new phenomenon.
It has been around as long as men who like young women have been around. I’ve seen two famous incidents: one from Hugh Hefner and one from the late Vince Vaughn. And then, of course, there’s the Harry Potter series.
So why it’s popped up recently? One source suggests that the younger generation is becoming more accepting of people who are “older” than themselves, which has led to an increasing number of folks in their teens and 20s dating “older” men.
The other argument is that as women are becoming more financially independent, there’s more of a need for attention from men. Which is totally understandable, but which also gives rise to strange relationships (e.g. sexy older men and young women).
2. But is it weird?
This is hard to tell. And it’s likely that if you’re actually in a relationship, people would have a clear answer for you. But for the vast majority of kids, it’s http://www.dateinblack.com/articles/best-hookup-news-on-interracial-dating-meet-black-singles-online
1. Match with a like-minded partner, and try meeting in a public place. This seems so intuitive, but I’ve been with a lot of women who can’t talk to a guy in public unless they’re “date-ready,” or they are holding on by a thread to the relationship they were in before they met this guy. Dude, we were part of a relationship before we met. He’s not all that. Yes, I would have been freaked out to meet your friends or family or what you like to do in your free time, but that’s because I would have felt insecure. I’m also the type who has lots of insecurity issues and has trouble with accepting limitations and boundaries—which are key to any good relationship—but you don’t have to be like me. So consider talking about your life with your match, especially if you’re both into poetry. For example, I met someone who liked dogs and I had kids, and I had lots of baggage about not being able to have kids. I was also juggling a crazy job, a crazy family, a crazy time at school, and crazy roommates. It didn’t occur to me that we wouldn’t be compatible, because I liked the guy, but I never discussed my life with him before meeting. We were both lonely people, so we naturally hit it off, but it was also because our outlook on life was so similar. You can easily find like-minded matches on whatever website is your favorite (eHarmony, Match.com, OKCupid, etc.). You can also search for “people with kids” on Plenty Of Fish—if you’re into that kind of thing. (I’m more of a tall-boy, so don’t expect me to get the meaning of that joke.) I had one date with someone, and we met at a local coffee shop (so we could talk), and got to know each other in a non-threatening way, without talking about our lives or our relationships. Then we had lunch.
2. Try asking about someone else before you ask her out. You know that awkward situation where you have a complete physical attraction to someone you just met, but you don’t want to be rude? You could ask a question to get the conversation rolling. (I’d go with a romantic question, like if she was in a relationship, but if that’s completely off-limits for you—yay, boundaries!) For instance, “Hi, do you like chocolate?” This is kind